We all like to play the blame game. We routinely like to find something or somebody to blame for our troubles. I suppose that we may find some comfort in this, and it may shift the focus of others away from whatever responsibility we take upon ourselves.
Recently New Orleans has been hit by a category 5 tragedy. A storm has caused enough destruction there to literally remove the city from the map. There are great life lessons to be learned there that we can apply to our own lives.
Storms happen. Our lives are routinely impacted by storms of every size. Children are impacted by gross abuse from caretakers and others that are no less devastating to them than Hurricane Katrina was to New Orleans. What is left of these children as they grow into broken adults is very tragic. As children they know no coping stragedy other than to hide this ugly shame and indignity under layers of self-denial and perhaps abuse of others.
We run across many such people in our ministry. People who as adults are discovering the reason for their inability to deal with life’s issues goes back to how in their childhood they had to deal with what were Category 5 storms to them. There are parts of these people that are afraid to come out of the shelter they have built to protect them from further abuse. The most tragic of these cases are where the abusers were those in whom they relied upon the most.
The solution is safe relationships. The healing process can be long and hard. God has designed us to love and feel loved by others. When this love is betrayed by abuse, is when the hiding begins. The hiding can only end when we find unconditional acceptance where we can bring our hurts and hang-ups into the light of relationship.